So I had a light bulb moment yesterday. I was mowing the yard and consciously focusing on God. Sort of a combination of praying, meditating and avoiding sticks. (Weird combination I know but there you go.)
I am a fixer. I know I've said before that as long as I have a plan I can handle anything. I don't think the WORD says however that I can do all things through Christ as long as I have a plan! I can get very wrapped up in the process of doing. kind of like a puppy when you first bring him home. He spends countless minutes running in circles, digging holes, chasing the ball, constantly running , moving, doing something. while you are waiting patiently at the side with the food and water bowl, just waiting for him to calm down long enough to notice you! I am like that puppy! Never stopping while God waits patiently. Then I collapse exhausted at His feet wondering why He isn't acting in my life. I got the distinct impression that God was waiting for me to stop yesterday. Stop and wait patiently for Him to show, teach and do.
I have this tendency to feel like God isn't going to act unless I'm doing something. Reality is Its not about me and what I do. All the scrambling and running and worrying isn't going to change God. I think he is waiting for this puppy to collapse at His feet and say "OK, I'm done" Then when I am worn out from all my scrambling, He acts. All He wants from me is a teachable heart not me trying to fix everything. I think the God of the universe can handle my life much better than I can. I just need to give up and let Him!