Like a darned 80’s sitcom

So Randy and I try to have a date night every Wednesday evening. Please don’t take this as super organization, or as how really good at focusing on our marriage we are, it started as a matter of necessity and we just fell into the habit.

Our kids go to youth on Wednesday evenings and since we live outside of town and have to drive in to drop them off and pick them up. We just stay and usually share a burrito at Chipotle for dinner. Last night we switched it up a bit and went to a pizza place downtown. Yes, I live in a small town now, and yes the picture above is of the downtown area for all my readers who are not K-State savvyJ. It is very picturesque with the limestone city hall, churches, libraries, shops, theaters and restaurants, even a cool art gallery and high class tattoo parlor (yes I have been inside, no I didn’t leave with anything though the idea intrigues me….) The only thing missing are antique stores. I totally don’t get that, but whatever.

ANYWAY! Last night as Randy and I ate at this great pizza place I watched across the street at a locally owned yarn and knitting shop. The lights were on and women were arriving instead of leaving. Not much is busy downtown Manhattan on a cold Wednesday night, so I know it was an event of some kind, maybe a knitting circle or a class. Can you picture it? Cold night, women scurrying to the front door bundled in coats and gloves, carrying knitting bags.  Opening the door and visibly relaxing in the warm shop; hugging friends, settling around the table in the front chatting the whole time. It just looked warm and cozy, totally small town and heartwarming. And there I was on the outside watching this fellowship of women, mingling, interacting, and feeling a little left out. Do NOT misunderstand me. My family would look at me as if I had grown another head if I said I wanted to learn to knit. That is the furthest thing from enjoyment this impatient, clumsy fingered woman could ever picture. But a part of me yearned a little bit just to be included in something that warm, a part of a place. I’m not sure that even makes sense to some people. I don’t honestly know if it would have made sense to me a few years ago. I had a place where I had grown up, made friends, made connections. I knew a lot of people between church, school, family and community.  I had roots with people. Then we picked up and moved here to Manhattan and I found myself alone.

I liked it at first, just putting myself into my husband and kids, making home and not missing crazy schedules. Then it got a little lonely. Not lonely as in alone, I have a great husband and wonderful kids, but lonely as in I missed the fact that I couldn’t pick up the phone and meet a friend for lunch or a soda. Or lonely in the sense that no one knew me, and I had to tell the same story every time I met someone new. From KC, Randy took a job here, kids in school, blah, blah, blah. Sad story I know! Now you’re thinking “What a whiner!!” And I really don’t mean it that way.  I know there are people who start over all the time, moving ton’s more than me and people who are much more alone than me.  I just had an idealized picture of what moving to a small town would be like. Friendly, lots of new Facebook friends, opportunities to know more people, and God really used it to teach me a lesson. Like a darned 80’s sitcom, my life is a lesson, who knew?!

I would meet women and think here is a person I could be friends with! We are so much alike! Only to stand on the outside getting the very clear message that “I have enough friends thank you very much, and I really don’t have the time or desire to invest in someone new.”  OUCH! I think maybe…..perhaps…..possibly…….okay I know I have said those words in my head when meeting someone new in the past. I think I might have even said them out loud to a good friend.  And there it is. I am totally confronted with who I am. Who I have been and it has come back to bite me firmly in the backside.

I know women need relationships with other women. It’s the way God made us. So when we have babies and sick kids and boy troubles and questions about faith and scripture and how to be whatever it is we are striving to be, we have someone with whom to share our burdens.   I know that, but it is still so easy for us to be so wrapped up in our own stuff that we miss people God puts in front of us to grow us. I’m not comparing myself or situation to people who are truly outcast or on the fringe. This was just God giving me a nudge to actually see the women around me who might need a friend or someone to just listen. I don’t think God wastes any moment of our life. It is too fast and fleeting to let whining about what is momentary distract us from what we are supposed to be doing.

Another life lesson learned. Honestly I always though getting older would mean I knew more. What it really means is that the older I get, the more I realize how little I know, and how big my God is.

         "Just as lotions and fragrance give sensual delight, a sweet friendship refreshes the soul"
                                                                                                              Proverbs 27:9 The Message

Update on Insanity!

I'm sorry its been so long since my last update. So many things have happened (or NOT happened, depending on how you look at it) I didn't even want to think about them let alone share them!

In my last post we were getting ready to close on the house. The movers were coming on the seventh and all was plugging along nicely. Sadly while I watched the movers cart all our stuff out of the house I got a call telling us we weren't going to close. Actually that was the beginning of a pretty bad week. The bank just turned down the house and wouldn't loan anything for it. Short explanation is that it is a unique rural property that just didn't fit any set criteria to judge value. Banks don't like things that don't fit the prescribed mould and we were toast. The buyers went to another bank and after several circus like hoops to jump through the house is due to close this afternoon. In one hour and 15 minutes to be exact. I won't be calm until I get the word that all is signed and DONE!!!

I will say this process has certainly been a growing experience. I know that God has planned this move for us. It is solely in His very cape able hands. I guess my humanness just jumps out and expects that when God is in control things will go smoothly and we won't struggle. God has certainly taught us in all that. I KNOW He is in control with every part of me. But this has been HARD, and to be completely honest I am so tired of things being hard. I'm ready for some easy:) God didn't promise us easy though, I'm sure Paul was wishing for some easy when he sat in his prison cell. At least I hope he was. That would make me feel better!

Spending time in scripture has been my lifesaver. Every time I feel myself starting to stress I would just focus on getting back into the word. Even when I was running to ballgames and the grocery store etc. I was thinking about when I was going to next get a chance to be back reading my Bible. Not doing in depth study on the faithfulness of God or anything, just reading. I started to read Job. Bad idea. If I wasn't stressed before that about pushed me over the edge. My friend Nancy sent me to Psalm 107. That was such a great chapter to read through. I used Psalm 106:48 for a status on Facebook the other day. It brought me great joy and a few "Amens" from friends. I hope it does the same for you.

"Praise be to the LORD, the God of Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. Let all the people say, Amen!Praise the LORD" Psalms 106:48

Moving to Manhattan

You wouldn't recognize me if you saw me. Sadly I look like I've been dragged backwards through a hedge......twice. I would post pictures for your entertainment, but the thought of those out there in the never land of the Internet doesn't bear thinking about!

We are drawing closer to what looks like the end of our time in Kansas City. The movers come on Monday to load up. (When I talked to the moving company the woman commented on how much stuff we had. I kept thinking "You should have seen me 6 months ago!")  We have gotten rid of so much! Most of our belongings are actually still packed. I haven't seen a box of my shoes since October!!

This time really is bittersweet though. Randy and I have lived here for the majority of our lives with friends that are very precious. We are so happy that God has provided a job that Randy loves and has made the path to that job fairly smooth and simple, But the thought of starting over in a new area is a bit daunting. I'm trusting God knows what He is doing. I'm just along for the ride :)

We have a contract on a house in Manhattan. Randy and I went house hunting a couple weeks ago and found three that we loved/disliked. They all had at least one major drawback and we couldn't decide which way to go. Finally we took the kids up last week and told them to decide. One house sold before we got there, which just told us that wasn't in God's plan. The other two were complete opposites. One was almost brand new, 3 bedroom 2 1/2 bath, beautiful house with an unfinished basement that had great potential. It was on 3.2 acres in the country with a view of the countryside. It's drawback was the lot. On a corner, house smack dab in the middle with no trees but some scrub cedar.
The other was 20 years old in a valley right in the middle of the Flint Hills tucked in a large lot subdivision on 3 acres. Wooded with open spaces, a big front porch and 4 bedrooms 2 1/2 baths. It's drawback was it's partial basement and Manhattan schools. (largest 6A high-school in the state of Kansas).
We saw the new house first and I could see the disappointment on Em's face. The boys were ambivalent. When we got to the second house all that changed. They all loved it and started fighting over bedrooms. Their excitement was contagious :) After some negotiating, it is ours(ish). Inspections are tomorrow morning.
I will post pictures when we are closer to truly owning it! There is some work that needs to be done and updating (rubbermaid blue counter tops). But the potential is fantastic. God is so good to us.

Please continue to pray for the Bartel's. Many of you know what the past year has been like for us. The thought of some stability and financial security feels a little like a dream. I know we are going where God is planting us, we are just learning to trust and lean on Him. Please pray that the kids transition well into schools and make friends. That we find a great church home. And that our finances allow us to get the house!!

Move Updates

Just a couple of updates. (And no the picture really doesn't have anything to do with the post. These are my kids in the front. was taken at my brother -in -laws wedding a couple weeks ago and I LOVE IT! IT makes me smile whenever I see it! It is just an indicator of how I feel right now.)
First: We have a contract on the house! We have had it for about a week. Tomorrow are inspections and after we are through the renegotiation process I will feel more comfortable saying we have "SOLD" the house. We have actually had the contract for 6 days, but things have been so crazy I haven't had time to update. I have to say since I posted the last time  God has just completely been in control of this process. I have done nothing. Everything that has happened, from the contract, to loan approval on our next house. God has opened doors and smoothed paths. I have started to stress a dozen times and God just whispers into my heart "BE STILL AND LET ME" and he has taken the stress and worry right away. Any doubt that Manhattan is where God intends us falters against that evidence!
Now we get to look for houses. Normally I love to look at houses but in this situation I'm not sure about where I'm going. God has opened doors wide up to now though, I'm sure He has this figured out too!

Second: Randy loves his job. That is a HUGE blessing! I know he would do it even if he didn't like it just to provide for us, but God is again blessing in His abundant way.

I'm trying not to be the puppy running in circles around God!

"I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom ans revelation, so that you may know Him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints , and His incomparably great power for us who believe." Eph 1:17-19

Update on the remodel

Just to give you a quick update on the remodel. We have obviously changed our focus and now we are are calling this our "Flip" HA! I've always thought it would be kind of cool to flip a house, now I'm not so sure. This is hard work! Today I made the obligatory trip to Home Depot, painted doors, pulled up the kitchen linoleum,  ordered the dumpster, and contacted the kids youth group to work on the yard for their work day next week. We are having to choose very carefully what to spend money on and what not to. It's hard to decide what will help us sell vs doing what is unnecessary. The kitchen is where most of our time and money will be. Earlier we planned to take a wall out and rearrange the layout. Now we are putting it back the way it was, just with all new everything!

It's a little bittersweet to do all this work and picture how great it will be when we get done, only to sell it as quickly as possible. This evening I was on the back deck getting rid of trash and I could hear the frogs in the pond on a neighboring property. I have to remind myself of what God has been writing on my heart lately. Let go of my dreams to allow God to accomplish something bigger than I can imagine. I'm trying!

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and HE will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

This verse was one of the first I memorised walking on campus back in the day. It's been one that has come often to my mind in the last few months.

Just to make you smile!

Just for grins I thought I'd show you what my basement looks like! We emptied out the two storage sheds we got when we moved in with my sister-in-law. Yea!!!!! I was so excited to get that second one done. Small bites:) We have one more storage shed but it has a lot of stuff we are going to continue to store, hopefully out here in the shed instead of paying someone to keep it for us. There are old doors I've collected, odds and ends of furniture I hate to get rid of, and car parts. We actually have most of the parts for a jeep out there somewhere. I guess its our "someday pile". (Or the beginnings of one heck of a garage sale this spring.) We have filled the shed here, so it might be a couple of months until we can get the rest. Randy is the master packer, so every time I think we can't fit anything else out there he rearranges and it magically empties!!

I've been so busy at work I haven't had time to deal with the piles this week. So Sunday I will take another picture and post it. That is my incentive to get it done this weekend. I don't want you to think we live this way all the time!!

Finally!

Almost five weeks past our scheduled closing. We Finally have a house!

This is the only picture I have right now. But I will be taking lots of before pictures today. I think it will turn out to be a great little place for us.

There are almost 4 acres, with lots of room for the dogs and kids:) The kids are already talking about what animals they want to get, and I'm dreaming of my garden!

Stay tuned for lots of before and after pictures!